Nun?

So, I'm sitting here in the local library.
Waiting for the Youth Center to open up.

I don't know if it's going to.


So I have to move out of the place I'm living. Mainly because my friends suck.
That's what I've concluded to atleast.
All I know is that God has His hands protecting me. He won't let me crumble. Nor will He help Satan screw up my life. I guess all I can really do now is hold my head up high. Keep my eyes on God. And hope He puts everything in place.

Oh, there is also a new Boy in my life.

So Boy is pretty amazing. When I'm around him I forget that there is a world. A bad one. I shouldn't want Boy in my life. I can't have Boy in my life. But I can't just stop talking to him. That would kill me. We hungout lastnight. With other people as well. Nothing special...

I should become a nun.

Joy.

So I have to find somewhere else to live.
Great.

So yeah.

So its weird, you know, being replaced by a lady.

My dad has been my dad for 16 years. Then, a lady comes into his life, and he kicks me out. I don't think it's fair, personally. I mean, he's my dad right? He's been there for me my whole life. And then he just throws me out life that?

One thing I realized thought. Is that even thought my dad threw me out. God won't. There's a scripture, I'm not sure what it is. But it says even though your earthly parents disown you, God won't. That finally clicked it. I mean, I know I'm not the best kid in the world. But he should still atleast love me. So yeah, that's my conclusion.

God loves me.

Oh, and you.

:)

Screw it.

A part of be understands what's happening. But then another part of me has no idea what's happening.

So alright, my dads girlfriend hates me, it's a given. One minute she's being nice. the next she's Godzilla on Crack. And so apparently I lied about doing something with her son. When he fully knows what happend. But, now, since his mom found out, it never happend. Apparently. So anyways. because of this stupid thing, I'm not aloud to see my sisters alot. Because he doesn't want me at the house.

So they are going on vacation across the continent, and I'm not invited. Because "I'm going to start a tantrum," (Quoted by my dads girlfriend). What bugs me, is that I've already changed a bit. And I don't get any recognition for it.

Oh, so another thing. She's buying everyone laptops. Because she can. But I don't get one. Because I can have the one downstairs. But I dont have enough room for a whole frikken computer. But according to her. I do.

She's taking over my family.. By the end of this, I'll probably like, never get to see my sisters.

Fuck.

welcome to my life

to think i'm only 17
and i've gone through so much crap already

shouldn't kids/teenagers be able to enjoy their childhood/youth hood.
you would think, wouldnt you?